Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
did i just pee glitter
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
