hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I still have a little drunk in my system
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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