i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
