Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
