Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
