"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
