Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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