I like my sex mixed with concussions.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
