bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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