I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
