So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
two words...techno handjob
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I love you. Go after that dick
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize