I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Randomize
