I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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