how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
