it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
