You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize