pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
