is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize