Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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