This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Randomize
