He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
