I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
too bad you live with your parents still
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize