i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize