so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
