are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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