he puts the penis in happiness.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
