going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Randomize
