32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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