If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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