return my video game
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
