absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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