I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
