She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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