Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I wish I could teleport
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Randomize
