Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
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