***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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