can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
