i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
