just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
My butt remains clenched, sir.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
