she looked like the before picture.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
