Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
it hurts more in the daytime
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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