I like my sex mixed with concussions.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
do herpes really smell.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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