She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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