porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Randomize
