did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
