I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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