Those balls look pretty dangerous.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
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