ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
