She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
