Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(506): View more from New Brunswick

Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?

(1-506): View more from New Brunswick

Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to

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(716): View more from New York

All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.

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(815): View more from Illinois

just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.

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(810): View more from Michigan

She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..

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(315): View more from New York

Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.

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